Balancing Rainbows

Double Rainbow over Playas, Ecuador

Once upon a time, on my never ending nomadic search for balance, I lived in a Rainbow Nation.  These days, however, I think it's time to re-examine my meaning of balance because going from one hair extreme to another just isn't cutting it anymore.  

Buddha, Padang Padang

Yes, I need something that will balance and unify my body, mind and soul once and for all?  Maybe it's finally time to take a serious adventure into this Yoga thingy?  

Just one quick question - to maintain balance and achieve my optimum Chi, do I actually have to go to yoga or could I just drink beer in yoga pants? I mean c'mon, what could be more Zen than empty calories?

Sunzal, El Salvador

People have asked, "What kind of yoga do you practice?" I make sure to let them know I'm not locked into any one kind of yoga. No siree, I do leisure center yoga, beach yoga, stand up paddle board yoga and even once did Cruise Ship Yoga.

Of course, that's not quite the answer they're looking for but what does that matter? I'm channeling Shakti, the ultimate feminine power of the universe! There wasn't even a little shake of Shakti in my TRX classes at the Montecito YMCA in California. TRX, total body resistance was designed by a Navy Seal and is pumped full of Yang male energy.  So now I've got the Yin and the Yang sorted out, surely I should start feeling more balanced? Unfortunately my Kundalini, my coiled serpent of energy within, still needs an alarm clock to kick it's slithery ass into action and get me to my lesson on time.

Naturally, on arrival to any kind of exercise class the first consideration is, "Am I wearing the right gear?"  There's only one thing worse than turning up and feeling like a complete kook and that's turning up and looking like one.  The safest option is always black on black with black flip-flops.  Although this backfired on me when the class ended and several pairs of the aforementioned black flip flops were waiting patiently for their soles at the door.  On the way out in the dim light, without my glasses, I accidentally swopped out my rather worn pair of Target thongs for a stunning pair of Havanas with a single diamond bling.  No! Truly! It was an accident.  

Waikiki

In Hawaii, they say: 
"you no leave wid bedda slippa dan you come wid." It certainly did seem particularly bad form, especially on the back of only two lessons so I rushed back the next morning to confess my heinous crime.  Although, more recently I've really been trying hard to move away from the "all black Ninja look". Luckily, after a sweep through the second hand clothing shops, I've managed to secure a lovely pair of animal print leggings. But, I'm still not game to wear them because I think they make me look like mutton dressed as lamb?  Besides, I'd hate to offend the vegan who is practicing one mat back who'd be forced to view my meaty derriere whilst I master "down dog".  Luckily there are no mirrors for me to see that my "down dog" looks more like nervous prairie dog. 

Clothing anxieties aside, the next piece of paraphernalia you have to worry about is the mat.  Currently, mine seems to be shedding little plastic waffly bits. Every time I unroll it, I'm caught in a turquoise blizzard which I surreptitiously sweep under said turquoise mat.  I'm still new to this, do I really want to invest over a hundred dollars in a piece of exercise equipment that won't even double as a towel rack?  Maybe I'll just return to K Mart and look for a new brown $4 mat so at least my synthetic snowflakes will blend into the wooden studio floor? 

Rockclimbing Utah

Yoga is like horizontal rock climbing crossed with ballet.  The sort of thing that makes you think, "Ya, sure, no problem, of course I can stand on one leg and bend over, I can do that." Well, guess what buckwheat?  It ain't so easy squeezy, in fact, it's really hard and I'm squashy in all the wrong places.

Costa Rica

Yet, I have to divulge the Yoga thing must be ticking all my boxes because it's making me believe I can balance rainbows some of the time, not just at the carwash.

Rainbow Wax at the Car Wash

Yes, I must be creating equilibrium in my life because I've been managing to make a session every day (well almost). Don't worry, it's not like I'm secretly planning to run off and join an Ashram or suddenly hand over all my charity shop treasures to the Hare Krishnas. 

Bahamas

I just wanted to support a friend who was partaking in her very own cool Dumb Blonde Adventure to qualify as a yoga teacher in India. Ahh, the very thought conjures images of Julia Roberts cycling carefree through rice paddies on an eat, pray, love journey somewhere. So in silent encouragement, I vowed to practice one yoga class a day to send my Om mantra in her direction.

Unfortunately, my chanting turns into panting especially when my Tapas, my inner heat seems to be set a little higher than everyone else's. The other day I felt like I'd accidentally dropped into a hot yoga class. Frantically I checked around for Mr. Bikram and realized it was time to embrace my Namascray, when the crazy in me honors the crazy in you. Naturally, the heat is the only reason I would ever put on a pair of tiny biker shorts in public (yes they are Ninja black, just in case you're wondering).

Although in confession, there was a different kind of tapas I needed to worry about.  The spicy Spanish sausage kind that I'd gobbled down the night before class.  I anxiously wondered if a thin layer of black lycra would contain the large Harley motorbike just waiting to roar out from my duodenum.  Still, it did provide extra motivation to "find my core" - I was so tense Dr. Kegel would have a hard time squeezing one out.  Instead of leaving the class with my Ananda, my bliss illuminating my face with a Bhakti, devout glow, I looked like I'd gone eight rounds in a Sumo Ninja wrestling competition. 

Hollister Ranch, California

Sometimes I wear a watch, yet another faux pas.  I know it's not cool in these circles but I can't help it.  I need it as a mind control just to be sure how much longer the panting will go on for.  It's not like I would actually have the yogi cojones to leave early, I'd just hide my silent tantrum in child's pose. 

To be fair or even dare I say balanced, there is plenty of upside to yoga.  The fitness, the flexibility, there's always bliss music playing and the teachers have floating hypnotic voices like velvet wrapped steel.  They seduce me to touch my toes, reach a little further, breath a little deeper.  I saw a part of my leg the other day that I haven't visited with in years.  These yoga whisperers give wings to your bird of paradise, your crane, crow or even just a sleeping pigeon. 

 Lake Tanganaki, Tanzania

And sun salutations, what's not to love about that? I've always reverently embraced the sun - mostly from a beach mat. However, I've been working really hard and making some progress within the four corners of my yoga mat. Although I'm nowhere near reaching Namaslay, when you're killing it on your yoga mat.

Dominican Republic

Yoga is teaching me that nothing comes without Drishti, focus. Unfortunately, I have a wandering mind...a couple of mats over there was a girl with an amazing pair of yoga pants patterned with beautiful vines. They twisted up her legs, off the material at her midriff and escaped onto her torso as a vine tattoo. Then the leaves waved my Drishti beyond the four walls and I marveled at the setting sun through the floor to ceiling windows. Silhouettes of rainbow lorikeets flickered amongst the tall stands of Eucalyptus, their chatter serenaded by a cicada chorus in full voice. Swaying around in tree pose surrounded with fluttering Twilight was surely nirvana in itself?

I think I glimpsed the balance of nature.

Finally, as the hard yoga minutes draw to a close the Universe rewards you with meditation time in Shavasana or Yogasm, the feeling of bliss when you're done. Lying flat on your back making snoring noises is a pose completely not available in rock climbing or ballet!  So, yes I am feeling a greater union with Yoga.

Although I have to admit, it has taken me a little longer to hit publish on this blog entry as I wondered what a yoga post would do to my cyberspace karma? I didn't want Lord Shiva to smite me down with his three-pronged trishula. Come to think of it perhaps that is what those twinges are in my left hip.  No, I think what I was waiting for was a little guru inspiration to help balance my thoughts with my body.  And now everything is in alignment. 

I did some yoga for my friend now I'm doing some more for me.

I didn't go to India but I have been on an adventure. Not just a yoga journey but a journey to understand all you need is a little humor and a few inspirational moments to keep balancing rainbows.

Namaste, the acknowledgment of the soul in one by the soul of another.